


Missing You

by Smokeycut



Category: Green Lantern (Comics)
Genre: Elseworld-canon divergence, F/M, anachronistic order, yellow lantern Simon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2018-08-04
Packaged: 2018-09-12 02:18:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9051337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Smokeycut/pseuds/Smokeycut
Summary: Simon Baz and Jessica Cruz have been partners for a long time, but fear can drive a wedge into any relationship. Can they survive it?





	1. Miss Me

"Do you miss me?" Simon whispered, his voice cautious, uncertain. His nails dug into his palms, and his knuckles paled beneath their yellow and black gloves. The moonlight granted a spotlight to Simon and his companion, illuminating their conversation in a literal sense.

Jessica looked him dead in the eye, not bothering to hide her heartache. It had been weeks since she last saw him, and so much has changed since then. It seemed as though every time they met, Simon was different in some way. She raised a hand to caress his cheek, but recoiled when she remembered the ring he wore on his finger. "Oh, Simon... I miss who you used to be."

"I'm still that person, Jess. I'm not any different. You know me, you know that I'll always fight for what's right!" Simon pleaded with the Green Lantern, reaching out to take Jessica's hand, only for her to drift away from him, leaving him grasping at thin air. " _Jessica, please!_ Don't do this to me. Don't shut me out..." 

Jessica turned her head away, unable to look at the Yellow Lantern floating before her. Her gaze turned towards the buildings below them, and she bit her lip, desperately wishing she could forgive him for all that he's done, but knowing that she could never do it, at least not right here. Not while he saw no fault in the oppression he aided. She felt as though her heart was going to burst from chest, and it took all her might to quell her anxiety and say what had to be said. 

"You used to be so sweet, Simon. So caring. You were a guardian, a protector. Now I can hardly even recognize you. I can't do this, Simon. I-I just can't. The things you've done for him, the people you've hurt... I can't be complicit in that. You aren't the guy I met all those years ago. Not anymore." 

"You're wrong about me, Jessica. I'm not hurting people, I'm saving them! I'm protecting them! You know as well as I do that Hal isn't doing _anything_ to keep the universe safe! Sinestro may not have as good of publicity, but he gets _results_." The Yellow Lantern caught himself, and watched as his former partner stared at him in fear. He straightened his posture, and in a small burst of golden light, his mask vanished, allowing Jessica to see the face beneath it. Flecks of yellow light hung in the night sky around them, glowing like fireflies. "I'm still me, Jess..."

He closed the distance between them, floating ever so slightly higher than her. His ring shined brighter, and he offered a reassuring smile. "I'm still Simon. The guy who spent an entire afternoon baking ma'amoul with you. The one who you held a weekend long Gilmore Girls marathon with. Only the ring is different, I promise. I haven't changed."

She sighed, and allowed herself to take a small moment just to caress his cheek. "I miss you Simon. I do, every single day, but it doesn't change what's happened. Missing you doesn't make it okay. It doesn't make you who you used to be." Her hand fell away from his face, and she touched her ring absentmindedly. 

His face fell, and he called out to her, "Do you remember the time we fought those pirates on Vogsphere?" Simon touched his own ring, and began to laugh. "And the captain, he tried to propose to you. So you hit him with a giant anvil." 

Jessica chuckles softly at the memory, and smiled weakly at Simon. "Remember the time you got into a shouting match with that guy at the nudist beach?" 

"I had to make a construct of a towel around his waist just so I could stop feeling awkward," Simon added, chuckling.

Simon offered her his hand once more, smiling softly. "Come with me, Jess. We can still fight side by side. He'll give you a yellow ring too, and we can protect people. Really protect them." Simon's face fell again as he saw the way Jessica looked at him, disgusted, and his resolve wavered. "Just... please don't leave," he whispered.

Jessica looked at her partner's offered hand, then at her ring. Sighing, she removes the ring from her finger, and gently placed it in Simon's hand. "I'm sorry, Simon," she whispered, turning on her heel and leaving him behind her. Simon looked down at the golden band resting in his hand, and closed his fist around it. He looked at his own wedding band and cursed under his breath. His mask came into shape once more, but he didn't leave. He simply watched as his love flew away, and he stayed long enough to see her trail of green light fade into the black.


	2. Forever and Always

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For a while, I didn't think I'd end up finishing this thing. But then today I suddenly found that I had broken through the writer's block for this story, and I knew exactly how to progress with it. I'll try not to take too long between updates from now on! 
> 
> Thanks for waiting, guys. It'll be worth it.

"Did you miss me?" Simon asked, nuzzling Jess from behind. She leaned into it, turning her head so that she could see him out of the corner of her eye, while he placed kiss after gentle kiss in the crook of her neck. 

"Mm, back from work?" She asked, purring softly. "Didn't think it was that late yet."

"Nah, just on break. Had to stop by Keystone City to help Flash with some alien speedster. Gotta be back at the shop in 5." 

Jessica turned around until she faced Simon directly. He slid his hands down to hold her around the waist, and she brought her hands up to his shoulders. She always loved the way he looked in his uniform, the green and black fabric wrapped tight around his body. It didn't leave much to the imagination, especially with his muscles. The way his biceps bulged under the short sleeves was her favorite part. She knew they they wouldn't have enough time for any meaningful conversation before he had to go, but there were always kisses. One on his cheek, and one on the lips, before he left. And when he got back home, far more than that. As long as neither of them got called out for Lantern business, of course.

"Be back in two hours. Promise," Simon said. And then he left, with a trail of green light following him as he flew out the door.

What she didn't know was that Simon had lied to her about work. His shift had ended early that day, and while he hated to lie to her, there was something he needed to do. Something that Flash, Wally, had promised to help him with after their battle earlier in the day. 

•••••

Simon met back up with Wally at the Watchtower, and found that the speedster had enlisted some further help. Barry, the other Flash, was racing around and hanging streamers and banners all over the place. Wonder Woman was directing Batman and Superman on where to arrange flowers on the roundtable. Cyborg and Aquaman were debating the best mood lighting, and the rest of Earth's Lanterns were floating outside the window, laughing in the vacuum of space over some joke that John had cracked. 

Simon smiled wide, and checked on the engagement ring that he had been carrying in his pocket.

"You nervous?" Clark asked, approaching Simon and leaving Bruce alone to follow Diana's orders.

"Hah, hard not to be," Simon said, scratching the back of his head. "It means a lot to me that you guys are helping out with this, though. Jess and I have been talking about it a bit over the past few weeks, and I think we're ready. But I don't think it's possible to not be nervous, you know?"

"Oh I know. Proposing to Lois was just about the most anxiety inducing thing I've ever had to do, and I fought Doomsday."

Clark put his hand on Simon's shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. 

"Trust me, Simon. You're gonna be fine. I've got faith in the two of you, and so does everyone else. We wouldn't be here otherwise."

Simon nodded, took a deep breath, and gave Barry the signal to call Jessica up to the Watchtower.

•••••

Jessica flew up to the Watchtower and entered through the airlock, then ran to the meeting room as fast as she could go.

"Flash?! I came as fast as I could! What's the emergenc- Oh. Oh God."

She took in the sight of it all at once. Everyone standing around, waiting just for her. Knowing smiles on their faces. Even her sister and Simon's were standing there, right between Cyborg and one of the Flashes. She even saw Simon's _mom_ , standing right by Batman. And in the center of the room, right in front of the table, stood Simon. The mask of his costume dissolved as she walked towards him, and he extended an open hand to her.

"Simon? What is all this? Barry said there was a League emergency..."

"Sorry about that. I wanted this to be a surprise, but we may have gone a bit far. Still, we set all this up for a reason. And now that you're here..." He took her hand in his own, and then knelt down on one knee. From his pocket, he pulled out a simple golden band, and raised it so she could see.

"You _didn't_..."

"I did. We've been partners for four years, Jess. Dating for two. And I knew that I wanted to spend every day of my life with you ever since we first took down Atrocitus together. You drive me nuts, J-Bird. Always have. And you... you're the most beautiful woman I've ever met. I've been all across the entire universe, and nothing holds a candle to you. So... yeah. Will you marry me, Jess?"

Jessica collapsed to her knees, and Simon saw tears well up in her eyes. She could hardly see him through the blur, so she shut them tight, wrapped her arms around him, and kissed him.

"Of course I will, you dummy," she told him, laughing through the tears. She kissed him again, and he started to cry too.


	3. Was It Worth It?

Simon stood on the edge, and he knew it. He knew that his grip on his own soul was slipping, but that didn't have to mean he should try to cling any tighter. Why bother? Why keep trying to protect people when they just saw a monster? Why not just let go of it all, so that his fear could never make him weak again? That's how the other Yellow Lanterns behaved, how Sinestro urged him to act. The Green Lanterns didn't understand that fear, the fear of losing those you love.

They were so ungrateful. He became _stronger_ for _them_. He chased _power_ for _them_. He sold his _soul_ for _them_. To _protect them_. To keep anything from hurting them _ever again_. 

But then he looked at the yellow ring on his finger. It's soft glow was the only thing, save for the starlight, that illuminated the cliff he stood on. He didn't know why he came to this planet, of all places, to think. But he did. Whenever he needed to get away. He wasn't welcome on Earth anymore, not unless he felt like getting into a fight with Guy. Looking at the ring though, he didn't feel strong. He just felt empty. It was a sickening reminder of everything he had given up just to get it, and everything he had done since.

"It wasn't worth it," he whispered to himself, his shoulders sinking. His voice shook as he spoke, and his eyes welled up with furious tears. He fell to his knees on the grass. "It wasn't worth a damn thing I got in return..."

He thought about his sister, Sira, and he watched as she materialized before his eyes. A small yellow figure, almost like a sprite, smiling at first, laughing warmly. But she vanished just seconds later, as he held his head in his hands. She always believed in him, no matter how bad things looked. He hadn't seen her in forever, not since a few weeks after getting the ring. He had no idea what she thought of him now. The others must have told her. Called her up to let her know that her little brother had gone supervillain. That if they saw him, they'd arrest him for aiding Sinestro. That she'd be tainted by association, just like before.

When he looked up, his mask dissolved, and he saw Jessica standing above him, floating just over the edge of the cliff. Not as his ring's depiction of her Green Lantern uniform, but rather the way he remembered her at home. Wearing bunny print pajamas, with her hair messy and tangled from lack of brushing. She smiled down at him, and she wiped a tear from his eye. And then she turned on her heel and walked away. Specks of the light that made up her form fell away, until there was nothing of her left.

"I'm sorry," Simon said, reaching out after her. "I never should have done this. I wanted to protect you, but... it wasn't worth losing you... I'd give anything to make things right. To have things go back to the way they were. To have you in my life again..."

"Those are familiar words," another voice spoke out. Simon had thought he was alone, but evidently that wasn't the case he turned around to look at the other person as they finished speaking. "I've thought them a million times myself."

Kyle stood behind him, a gentle white light emanating from his body, and a similarly gentle look on his face.


	4. Fear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should really start updating this more often, huh? Sorry this one is so short, but all of the chapters after this should be longer. This one was just planned out as a single scene, and I wanted to focus more on the emotions of the moment than the context around it, which doesn't matter as much.

Simon felt numb. His costume flickered in and out of existence, the light coming and going like a bulb in a run down public restroom. His heart was hammering a mile a minute and he couldn’t think through the pounding in his head. He knelt on the ground with his hands on his head and he felt like he was about to heave.

Sinestro stood above him with an outstretched hand. 

“You know you cannot protect her forever, Baz. Not with that pitiful green ring,” Sinestro told him. He spoke in a whisper, but the words boomed in Simon’s mind. Behind Sinestro was an image, one of Jessica battling against a monstrous alien. Fighting and losing. Simon’s ring was running on empty and he couldn’t recharge without her.

“I can’t… I can’t do it…” Simon muttered. He wanted to run off, to try and save her, but he couldn’t. He was so scared. He had never been that scared before. Scared enough that he felt cold and shook without pause.

“Because will is a fool’s weapon!” Sinestro hissed. “But I can feel strength in you, Baz. You need only to embrace what you have long denied. Embrace your true nature and save her!”

“I-I’m not like that!” Simon insisted, although it was clear in his voice and body that his resolve was weakening. Sinestro’s words were worming their way inside his head, and he was beginning to believe them.

“You are, Baz! And you know as well as I do that the only way to save her is to abandon your weakness and embrace fear! Are you just going to sit there and let her die?”

“No!” Simon cried out in anguish. 

“Then take it!” Sinestro demanded. 

But Simon had already snatched the ring from Sinestro’s palm before the words left the villain’s mouth. The green ring fell from Simon’s finger of its own accord, and he slipped the yellow one on in its place. The light of his uniform changed hue until it matched his new weapon, and the symbol on his chest changed as well. 

Sinestro smiled to himself as Simon flew off to assist his wife. Everything had gone according to plan.


End file.
